Saturday, August 18, 2012

Note to My Half Brother Chris Shropshire: Here's Why I Think You're a Fuckin' Moron for Enlisting

(Actually, I'll be writing more about this. You should consider this a first chapter, pretty boy Chrissy...)

 So anywho, my half brother Christopher Shropshire, who recently enlisted in the War Crimes or Us American Army  like a fuckin' moron, posted this on his Facebook page.

So, you know, I think I wrote something but by my own standards of cruelty it was quite harmless. I can't check because I've been defriended  by my own half brother (big loss but more on this Facebook thing later...) and so I think I wrote:

"Well I think that enlisting was a mistake but nobody thinks you're a pussy for it. On the other hand, it's kinda cool having a half brother who can do consulting work for 'Burn Notice'."

And that's it. His wife responded and it was kind of sarcastic because it wasn't the Support the Troops Fox news bullshit that she's used to hearing. And that's all right. I think I said that I liked the post even when I didn't mainly as a friendly gesture because if Chris Shropshire wants to go off and murder Afghan civilians, accidentally I'm sure,  hey that's up to him. We all have different and ironic ideas of what constitutes "fun". I'm sure they'll all die justifiably. Yes I'm being sarcastic all those dead civilians notwithstanding.

So then I get this private message from Christopher Shropshire, possible future war criminal or Ranger School dropout or deserving casualty of the war -- because we never know what the wondrous future may bring -- which says this:

 " i saw you comment that my joing the army was a mistake. 1. nobody fucking asked you 2. you're a not even a has been you're just a never been. we're done I'm not going to waste anymore time on this shit because just being you is punishment enough.."

First, your grammar is just atrocious. But seriously almost every word that Chris writes is, almost, completely fucking wrong. Not to mention badly written...that's the worst offense.

Well, as they say in the movies, "allow me to retort".

1. nobody fucking asked you

Actually, you can screen your posts in Facebook so that certain people only see certain things. Unfortunately, because you're kind of dim witted about Facebook protocols the post was made available  to all your so-called "friends". So, as a matter of fact, you were asking me fuckwit. I hope you're getting the details better on munitions training. Gosh, it would just break my heart if something bad happened to you.  It's good to see that the army is still recruiting the Best and the Brightest Gomer Pyle.

2. you're a not even a has been you're just a never been.

Technically, this will require some tricky phrasing, but the truth of it is that I'm a "was been" and "still am". I am a prolific and widely published professional writer because, hey, I'm smarter and more talented than you Chris.  I've written about things that you and your deeply stupid twat wife (the war (many wars in fact if you consider the range of our drone strikes)  is about defending me Jen Shropshire...are you that naive?) can barely pronounce. I don't brag  about it because I'm not so insecure about my manhood and what I've accomplished as a writer  that  I have to defriend people on Facebook who say slightly sarcastic things to me. Semper Fi or whatever....

Oh, and for the record, I'm not that impressed by one time state congressional losers and insurance salesmen. You know the funny thing about that race is that they knew you well and they still voted against you. Perhaps they saw what I see in you: a vacuous privileged pretty boy materialistic lightweight who wouldn't understand the problems of ordinary people if they bit him in his scrawny little beige ass.

Just so you know...Hey, if working for newspapers and trying to help black folks while I was doing it makes me a loser then hey I'll take being a failure in your ever so discriminating eyes.

 we're done I'm not going to waste anymore time on this shit because just being you is punishment enough.."

Well, technically again, you never wasted time on me before. We haven't had a single conversation since Dad, the conscientious objector in the Vietnam War  who I'm sure would be brimming with pride over your enlistment, died. That was 11 years ago. I think we've had two discussions in over two years on Facebook. I usually don't comment on your silly vain materialistic posts about Kewl Cars because most of the world doesn't have enough to eat. Good to see you've got your priorities in order soldier boy. I mean, I sort of get that in that I wouldn't like the kids that my dad had from a previous life, either. So I never took it personally.

Oh, and just for the record,  here's a quick list why I have no respect for your enlistment.

1.) The main fighting is pretty much over. You'll be an occupying force essentially killing people who have the audacity to live on stuff that we want. It's like joining up to fight Hitler in 1946. (Update: I don't want to underestimate our capacity for new and unnecessary wars. You might get the distinct thrill of shooting a Nigerian freedom fighter. Then there's always Iran or the hills of Pakistan, which you're not supposed to be in...ahhh, the thrills of the military...)

2.) The wars we wage are mainly against people of color, of which I am one. I remember that apparently. I think those wars are extremely dishonorable and are not the vocations of decent or truly courageous men. Look up the terms "expropriation" and "good german". That's you in the mirror there winner. You're like a black guy who fights for the confederacy.

3.) I would be hesitant to fight and die for a country that clearly doesn't give a fuck about me or other black people.  And hey if you actually lived in a black neighborhood like I do then you would know this. The direction of this country for black Americans is privatized prisons. The fact that a black president is presiding over it doesn't necessarily make it better, although I will vote for him because he's better than Romney...who isn't? I mean, if the Nazis are back or you want me to stick a knife into a confederate soldier then, hey, sign me up. Poor colored folks abroad, backward ass theocrats though they may be, not so gung ho about that. And not for this country at this time...

4.) The wars are so blatantly about resource theft that, quite frankly, they are within their rights to kill you because you're the evil invader. They have every reason not to trust the United States. I mean, there is an informative website or a thousand if you can turn off the Hannity for awhile...

I hope that clears things up for you. You know, if something bad happened to you before this I probably could have faked a tear or two for someone I didn't know very well. Now my response would be this:

You reap what you sow. Oh and don't worry I won't come to the funeral and vice versa I would sincerely hope. It's probably not fashionable to spit on the corpse.

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Forbidden Pics of Possibly Why Black Kiss Got Banned in Britain

I can't publish these pics over at Comics Forge because they have standards and decorum. While here I clearly have none. These are the two pics that I think got Black Kiss 2 banned in Britain. Not sure if that ban is still in place...


Monday, August 13, 2012

Tribute to the late comics artist Joe Kubert with full frontal nudity.

Here's some art from the late Joe Kubert. As per usual here's the completely superior obituary by Tom Spurgeon or the slimmed down Comics Reporter dude. Try here and here.

Here's something I think Joe Kubert did just a few weeks ago. Kubert might be gone but he was certainly alive when he inked this. How does one get into those  Kubert school live modeling anatomy classes? I know they must teach that.

Here are some other pieces I found. 


Get the Fully Embedded Chris Shropshire (Pre Memorial) Atrocity News

Turns out that you can embed that Chris Shropshire Atrocity News online newspaper. Or is that the Christopher Shropshire Atrocity News online newspaper? Hard to say. Very difficult.

Tuesday, August 07, 2012

Milton Hershey School completely folds and gives up and admits HIV positive kid.

ITEM: The big news today is that the Milton Hershey School completely reversed itself on its not admitting that HIV positive kid to its school. They offered him a spot but the lawsuit continues although I'm not sure on what issues, probably lawyer fees. I really think that was the smart move by the school because their case made no sense at all, which I pointed out here some months ago while, admittedly, perhaps picking on a girl who used to be my friend otherwise known as Connie McNamara or as I affectionately refer to her: The Face of Terror. I'm looking for video feeds of Connie offering the about face but I see nothing so far. I think that's bad for Connie because she had to go out there and explain why killing kittens with mallets every Tuesday or so was a really really great policy for the MHS. ("For the children don't you know and we're not monsters for oh my we carefully deliberated not killing kittens in front of school students with big metal mallets but we're special in that we're very very rich and the rules of science and decency don't apply to us and don't I look maternal and comforting?"...) But now that they've done the decent thing she doesn't get a chance at Youtube redemption? 

You know I run a video of her defending their "Let's carve out new discriminatory policy against HIV positive people" on the Acid Jazz Channel because Connie has a really sexy voice and it used to hit on me. And no I wouldn't have believed that either if I hadn't lived it. But I just wasn't putting out back in college...have I mentioned these are painful memories for me.? Ah well. Back to the topic...

I would certainly run a video with Connie explaining how they totally caved and decided that this was a civil rights violation. Or did she actually support that stupid policy? I sure hope not. I figure her job was a kind of putting pearls on swine kind of thing and that's her job to spin it.  I hope so. More as this news develops.

First edition of Chris Shropshire's War Atrocity Porn News

Just a few words of advice for my half brother Christopher Shropshire, who I believed I described as a fuckwit faux white boy and potential future war criminal (Or was it possible thrill seeking sociopath who murders gooks and sandniggers, who he resembles by the way so watch your back there Habib...)  over at the Facebooks: Never pick a fight with a guy who buys his ink by the pixel. The only reason I hadn't written about him before is that I didn't want to broadcast the fact that he was a one time political loser and looked to be a shallow materialistic uncreative guy, at least according to his almost unseemly worship of sports cars.

And with that we have the first issue of Chris Shropshire's War Atrocity Porn News. Or perhaps that would be more correctly stated as Christopher Shropshire's War Porn Atrocity News. I think the latter sounds better. There's also a paper featuring Chris Shropshire's name out there that collects anti war articles.

ITEM: Well if pretty boy Christopher Shropshire were to lose an arm and a leg let's hope he never has to use the VA. Or the Afghan National Military Hospital. Here's a story about The World's Greatest Army serving the World's Greatest County:

"There were glowing stories on NTM-A’s public relations web site about the progress of the [Afghan National Army] medical system," Col. Gerald Carozza, a senior Army lawyer, testified. "With conditions not changing from 2005 to 2010, why did the assessment and public relations reporting show improvement though early 2010 when the reality was clearly different?"
The new information also reveals fresh evidence of neglect at the hospital, possible corruption perpetrated by private Pentagon contractor MPRI, and allegations that top Afghan general Ahmed Yaftali sold 4.5 tons of U.S-purchased medical supplies to Pakistan and embezzled some $20 million in U.S. taxpayer dollars provided to the hospital.
Other documents obtained by BuzzFeed include new details on the Pentagon's efforts to stonewall the investigation — including attempts to keep key details from Congress and efforts to make witnesses unavailable to testify.

ITEM:  What kind of evil foreign (must be) monsters would bomb funerals? Glenn Greenwald gives us the details.

Whatever one thinks of all this, I hope that nobody will even think about comparing, let alone equating, these acts. Such a comparison would be disgusting. As Rudy Giuliani taught us when asked during his 2008 presidential bid whether waterboarding was torture: “It depends on the circumstances. It depends on who does it.”

Regardless of where one falls on the ideological spectrum, we must all join together to condemn the sin of moral relativism: therefore, the same act that is the hallmark of repulsive savagery when done by Al Qaeda, Assad, and the Hutaree militia is transformed into a moral and noble act when done by the Government of the United States of America. As U.S. political discourse has long taught, the crime of “moral relativism” is committed by holding everyone to the same standards – that’s “moral relativism.” One can avoid that pitfall only by exempting oneself and one’s own country from the moral dictates one imposes on everyone else.

ITEM: A nice reading list I'll be looking at from the excellent Guardian.